Maintenance Sucks!

Due to unforeseen technical problems beyond my control (basically the power company was playing around with the electric-over 1000 people had no power yesterday) my blog was delayed. But I'm back and I'm excited to share what I found out from Ancestry.com.

As I was digging through my mom's side of the family I discovered my poppy's father (great grandfather) had actually died of a cerebral hemorrhage. This information I had already know about because my grandfather had shared it with already. But what I discovered after this was crazy!

I found out that my great grandfather's mom (2x's great grandmother) had also died of a cerebral hemorrhage, but it didn't stop there. I was also able to find a death certificate for one of my great-grandfathers aunt's (2x's great grand aunt) that showed she too died of a cerebral hemorrhage.

So far I haven't been able to find anything else that links any other family member to 'death by cerebral hemorrhage, but then again I'm still finding my way around (when it comes to looking for records).

Below I'm going to share my 2x's great grand aunts death certificate and a photo of her, which I also found by digging a little deeper into the past.

PS: Sorry about having to make the death certificate so large it's the only way to see all the information. Also, my 2x's great grand aunt was married '4' times so her name was different at the time of her death (just to clarify).

My 2x's great grand aunt (Elizabeth Ward)

 

Hmmm...

Sometimes things need to just stay in the past. But other times it's fun to go back in time and see what the past can tell us. I was poking around my Ancestry tree again and found some more interesting info that I thought would make for a good blog tomorrow. Stay tuned and just to give you a hint it has to do with health and death. Feel free to leave guesses and comments below!

Feeling Creative

I was going through some of my old poetry. Wow what a walk down memory lane that was! I thought I would share one of the poems I wrote back in high school. Maybe I'll share more in the future. Guess you'll just have to see!

I HAD YOU

 

Your smile made everyone smile.

Your laugh made everyone laugh.

Your hugs made everyone warm.

Your food made everyone full.

Your spirit kept everyone together.

But since you're gone, so is everyone else.

The smiles are not smiles.

The laughs are not laughs.

The hugs are not warm.

The food is not filling.

Your spirit is not remembered.

But I do. I remember all of this.

And I miss it so.

You'll be in my heart.

I love you.

 

 

In memory of all those I've lost;

I will see you again!

Moving Forward

The blog below is raw and real. The text describes my feelings about certain people who will not be named and what I've seen and felt for the past 5 years. Proceed with caution:

Sooner or later you grow up. It's inevitable. It happens to everyone and depending on the person and the situation it can be easy or hard. For me I wanted to grow up fast. I couldn't wait to be done with high school, go onto college, get a job, and be on my own. But life never turns out the way you think it's going to.

I got married when I was 21. Some people thought I made a mistake or that their son made a mistake in getting married, but if I had to do it all over again I would. I don't regret the decisions I've made in my life because I love my life (I just wish my dad and poppy were here with me still). However, there are just some things I wish I could erase.

What do you do when it comes to overbearing parents? I'm not referring to mine because they've always treated me like an adult and respect boundaries when it comes to my marriage. I know that they care about me and love me to death, but they know when to butt in and when to stay out. What I'm talking about is my husband's parents lack of respect towards him as an adult.

The respect towards me and my family went out the window a long time ago, so I just shrugged it off and tried to ignore them. But when it comes to my husband and the way he's treated I can't stand by and not say or do something. The amount of pain I feel for him eats me up inside. What's worse is to have to sit by and watch them blatantly disrespect him (either to his face or behind his back).

When he tries to talk to them and let him know how he feels forget it. It just goes in one ear and out the other. One of the hardest things for me is to have to sit there and watch my mother-in-law flat out lie and say how much her son means to her and how much she loves him and misses him. It just makes my blood boil. She only misses him because he's not around to do things for her and be her little 'errand boy'. She doesn't have someone to kick around anymore and that pisses her off.

When it comes to his father and brother they're not any better. They lie right to his face and promise my husband things and then don't follow through with the promise they made. They use him just like his mother did. They all think that lying, stealing, and cheating is OK to do, newsflash it's NOT!!! What really hurt me the most of all was when my husband did have the courage to stand up to them. He stood there and asked for space and for them to back off but his words just fell on deaf ears and nothing changed.

I sat by for 4 years and kept my mouth shut. I wonder if I should have done that for so long. I was taught to respect your elders, but what do you do when you're not getting the respect back? When are you supposed to stand up for yourself? How long should you keep getting stabbed in the back and be someones punching bag? I think these questions will haunt me for a long time.

 

My husband and I are slowly picking up the pieces and putting them back together. It's not easy. Some days I wanted to give up. Some days he wanted to give up. But we supported each other and made it through the storm. I wish I could say that things are gonna be easier, but I don't know that, nobody does. I pray we'll find a silver lining in all this darkness. Only time will tell.



http://www.amazon.com/Toxic-In-Laws-Strategies-Protecting-Marriage/dp/0060507853/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1375587354&sr=8-6&keywords=toxic+parents

P.S. I recommend this book to anyone going through in-law issues. I only wish I would've found it sooner rather than later.