Yesterday I had to go with my husband to the VA hospital for him to have a check-up done. On the way back from the VA (we use the van that they provide) an older gentleman who has been friendly with my husband asked if we had any kids? My husband and I both answered no and he then asked if we wanted to have any, again we answered no. The gentleman then proceeded to explain that, that was what he said when he was our age and oh just give it time, it'll happen. It absolutely floored me when he said this. As I told everyone in my previous blog I am just 24 years old. My husband is 26.
When I met my husband we did discuss this, just as I'm sure any other couple would when they're dating or engaged. At the time he wanted kids and I explained to him that I didn't want any. It's not that I don't enjoy being around children, because I do. I have cousins that have kids and I've watched them before without a problem. I also worked for the CROP after school program at my school for 4 years and dealt with kids ranging in age from 5-13. I enjoyed what I did and didn't mind being around the kids (they taught me a lot about life and what the new generation is all about).
However, when I was 14 was when I realized that I didn't want to be a mother. I remember fondly coming home and telling my mother, father, and poppy that I was not going to have any kids because it wasn't for me. I don't remember the response but I remember that they said to give it time and it might change. But here I am 10 years later and it hasn't. I think part of the reason is because I am a selfish person. I know some people can't sit there and admit that, but I'm comfortable enough with myself that I can. I'm selfish and I don't want to have the attention taken away from me because I have a kid. I want to be able to spend time with my husband and see the world and not have to worry about having to take care of a baby.
We have two cats and plan on getting a dog in the future. Right now I view them as my babies because they need to be cared for but not 24/7. My cats are self-suffiecient and as long as they have food, a clean litter box, and get played with they are content with life. But a baby has to be clothed, bathed, diaper changed, be fed, rocked to sleep, played with, and a million other things and this is all before school. Not to mention the amount of money a child costs a family. Having a child can cost upwards of $200,000.00 up to when the child is 18 and attends college (this all depends on where you live and how much you make, etc.)
I'm not saying people shouldn't have kids, so please don't take that from this post. All I'm getting at is kids just aren't in my future and I made that decision a long time ago and plan on sticking with it no matter what the rest of the world seems to want to say or ask. I watched my mom raise me and my brothers and it still amazes me how she handled it all. But that's why she's my mom; she can do anything!
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